Back in the day, couples had to go through some hoops in the process of courtship before they could engage. It would all start with the man’s intent to settle down. Once he’s decided on this, he’s supposed to talk to the woman’s parents or guardians to ask permission to marry their daughter. Finally, he has the all-important task of choosing the engagement ring for his beloved.
Nowadays, young couples are more inclined to cohabitate rather than get married. The US Census Bureau reported that as of 2018, 9% of couples aged 18-24 are living together while only 7% are married. Furthermore, 15% of couples in their late 20s to early 30s choose to live unmarried with their partner (up from 12% a decade before). This phenomenon has become quite prevalent that some couples even choose to remain eligible for life.
However, for couples who do choose to get married, one thing remains the same: the need for an engagement ring. And if you and your sweetie have started talking about the possibility of getting married, here are three reasons why you should be part of choosing the engagement ring.
It’s Empowering
You have already declared yourself to be a modern woman the day you and your boyfriend proclaimed that you would start living together. Don’t you think being able to choose the engagement ring you’ll be wearing for life would further empower you? Or would you rather have your boyfriend floundering around the Internet, looking at various styles you might not even like, and guessing your ring size via an online chart?
Choosing your ring does away with this tradition and the guessing game that your boyfriend has to play. You get to pick a style that you want and set a budget for it. If you’re worried about the surprise factor being taken away, you can always start a shared ring option document. Browse the Internet, pick your favorites, and put them on paper. This way, your boyfriend has options he can choose from that he can guarantee that you’ll like, and you’ll still get a surprise on the day he proposes.
You Learn the Importance of Communication in Your Relationship
And you might also learn the value of compromising. You might have been living together for a while or for a short time before the subject of marriage comes up, and you might have been doing this successfully. However, you’d be surprised how many couples have failed the engagement and marriage test despite cohabitating successfully. The values of communicating and compromising get thrown out the window. Stop listening to sites that tell you, “It’s the bride’s day.” Your fiancé is just as entitled to have fun and have a say on the wedding itself because it is also his day.
Think of buying the engagement ring in the same way. He’s still paying for it (even in modern proposals, this seems to be the norm), and he might also want to have an input on the design. Understand that you have to listen to each other to keep the harmony.
You’ll Feel Closer to Your Fiancé
Consider this to be a bonding experience. You could learn more about each other as you browse through rings. It’s even more fun if you choose to design your ring. You can learn about each other’s aesthetics, and this could be a fun start to the wedding planning you will both be doing in the future. As you go through the first part of this adventure together, we guarantee you’ll learn more things about your future husband (and yourself!) the further along you go.